EXPECTATIONS

Most quarrels in life come down to one thing...someone fell short of your expectations or you of theirs. The entire argument could have been avoided had the expectations been made clear right up front. A simple conversation could keep a marriage from falling apart, put a stop to relatives bickering over only the Lord knows what, or something as simple as telling the waitress right up front to "please hold the pickles."

Expectations can be great, sometimes they must be lowered, but they must always be made known. This is the only fair thing to do as a human being. How can you fault someone for not doing what you expected them to if you do not tell them what you expect from them to begin with????????? Sounds confusing I know and you may even think it's trivial or a no-brainer. Well, you're wrong...sorry, but you are.

We fault people each and every day because they don't wear their hair a certain way, they don't walk the way you walk, they don't pray the way you pray, or they don't come visit you regularly. Well, do you visit them? Have you ever asked them over? Did you say to them, "please come visit me...I really need a friend right now?"

Tell people exactly what you expect from them. Keep in mind though, we all make mistakes. There isn't a single soul on this planet that is perfect. WE WILL MESS UP!!!! We won't do it maliciously. We'll try not to do it often, but it is going to happen. There is a 100% chance this is going to happen if we don't tell others what we expect from them.

So, before you go judging others around you and holding it against them that they screwed up royally think to yourself: did I tell them what I hoped they would do, did they do this to hurt me, is what they did or didn't do really all that bad, is being mad at them worth it???? Stop. Think. Calm down. Then speak. If we all took the time to do those things blood pressures would lower, friendships would stay on course, time wouldn't be wasted on resentment, and we may just find ourselves learning how to communicate with another like grown adults and not hot-headed 4 year olds who just had someone take our shovel in the sandbox.

God Bless,
Tammy